I, COLITUS

A Rollicking Roman Farce - Royalty Free

The Fall of Rome, Has Never Been This Funny

A wildly outrageous comedy farce where Julius Caesar's biggest battle isn't with Rome's enemies— it's surviving his own friends, his wife, Cleopatra...and the Ides of March.


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About the Show

Get ready for a chariot ride of laughs in I, Colitus, an outrageous, high-octane comedy set during the final days of Julius Caesar. Fresh from conquering the known world—or at least the parts worth conquering—Caesar returns to Rome dreaming of one final achievement: becoming a god. Unfortunately, his closest allies have a far more permanent promotion in mind.


The ambitious Cassius and self-important Brutus are plotting assassination while Cleopatra arrives in Rome determined to seduce Caesar and secure power for herself. Standing firmly in her way is Caesar's formidable wife, Calpurnia, who has no intention of letting Egypt's queen steal her husband—or Rome.


With the Ides of March closing in, only one person may be able to stop history from repeating itself: Colitus Ventriculitis—Caesar's overworked, underappreciated advisor...who also happens to be his slave. If Colitus can keep Caesar alive just a little longer, he might finally earn his freedom.

Meet the Chaos

Julius Caesar

Conqueror. Ego the size of the Empire. Desperate to become a god before someone makes him one permanently.

Colitus Ventriculitis

The smartest man in Rome...and unfortunately Caesar's slave. Every ridiculous scheme is another chance to earn his freedom.

Cleopatra

Beautiful, brilliant, ambitious, and utterly determined to rule hearts, Rome, and anything else within reach.

Calpurnia

Caesar's fearless wife. If Cleopatra doesn't leave Rome, someone certainly will.

Brutus & Cassius

Rome's most incompetent conspirators are determined to make Caesar immortal—for all the wrong reasons.

The Roman Chorus

Always speaking the truth...at exactly the worst possible moment.

Why You'll Love It

⚔️ Rapid-Fire Comedy

Fast-paced dialogue and nonstop laughs from beginning to end.

🏛 Roman Mayhem

Political intrigue, ridiculous conspiracies, and historical chaos turned completely upside down.

😂 Clever Wordplay

Packed with witty jokes, absurd situations, and delightfully bawdy humor.

🎭 Perfect for Everyone

Whether you love history, Shakespeare, satire, or simply great comedy, there's something here for you.

One Act    Full Evening     Ten Minute    Script In Hand    Raising Kane – Comedy Play Collection